Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
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