Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
