Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
