you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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