K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Randomize
