yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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