He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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