I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
