a queef is a wish your heart makes.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
