Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
