well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Randomize
