Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
okay pat passed out under dana's car
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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