do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
