walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
