Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
