I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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