tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
