lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Randomize
