I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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