your room smells of hookers.
And success
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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