I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize