my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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