I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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