Don't make out with my wife yet
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize