Where did you get a picture of my penis
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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