She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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