What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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