this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
