I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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