Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
