and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
What a dumb baby whore.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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