Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize