we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
