Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Randomize
