there was a trapeze. enough said
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
