I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Please don't give away my fajitas
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