You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
