gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
