That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
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