no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
