She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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