so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
