Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
