Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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