that's an acceptable place to lick
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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