Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
