i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize