just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
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