Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
