they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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