Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
