i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
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