Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Randomize