I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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