You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
